Are my reactions and emotions normal? Damn, I hate the old devil!?

Your dad seems like a real piece of work. If i were you i would not go see him. You haven't seen him in how long? and you dont care much for him, why should you care now? I understand he is dying, but realistically you dont care, and you shouldn't. All the things it seems that he has put you through is hard enough. Why go relive a tramatizing past for his benefit?