I fear i am becoming everything i never wanted to be?

My dad is manic depressive and my parents have been divorced for like 10 years now and im a female 16 year old i think im manic depressive but i don't want to get help i don't want anything t be wrong with me and i don't want to be like my dad. and if there is somthing worng then people will look at me differently. Also i get lke so depressed and so happy sometimes i cry and just want to kill my self this happens alot, i hit walls and have only cut myself nce a while ago but i just don't know what to do also when im upset i get this shooting pain in my arms and wrists why does that happen?